3D TV: Not for the drunk, tired, or pregnant
Two-dimensional images are so 2009.
2010 promises to be the year of 3D TV, and there's no shortage of eye-popping displays on the way. Sharp recently announced its "Aquos" 3D LCD TV, billed as the world's first four-primary-color 3D LCD set; LG is working on an LED-backlit 3D TV of its own. Samsung's even starting to mass-produce its 3D TV screens, a move that'll help countless Americans see Ryan Seacrest like they've never seen him before.
Before you jump out of your chair in full three-dimensional excitement, though, there's something about 3D TVs you should know.
A 3D TV Warning
Behind all the buzz about the 3D TV technology stands a stern warning: If you're a teenager, a pregnant woman, a senior citizen, or a drunk, you shouldn't necessarily be watching it. The same applies if you're just really, really tired.
Sound crazy? Maybe. But it's the real deal—in fact, the alert comes straight from Samsung, makers of a whole gaggle of upcoming new 3D TVs.
Tucked away on one of the company's Web sites is a page boldly entitled "3D TV WARNING." There, you'll find the following cautions:
Children and teenagers may be more susceptible to health issues associated with viewing in 3D and should be closely supervised when viewing these images.
Pregnant women, the elderly, sufferers of serious medical conditions, those who are sleep deprived or under the influence of alcohol should avoid utilizing the unit's 3D functionality.
The take-home message: If you're a drunk and sleep-deprived pregnant woman over the age of 75, for the love of Randy Jackson, stay away from the television.
The 3D TV Effect
One more note from the 3D TV warning center: Even if you aren't drunk, your 3D television may make you appear that way. Ahem:
Viewing in 3D may cause disorientation for some viewers. Accordingly, DO NOT place your TV television near open stairwells, cables, balconies, or other objects that can be tripped over, run into, knocked down, broken or fallen over.
Man—who even needs the booze when you have one of these bad boys around?