The Macalope Daily: Earth-shaking iPhone rumors

Tuesday sure was a big day for iPhone rumors, as two pieces of hearsay shook the very ground we walk on (offer valid on the East coast only).

First up, Reuters!

Asian suppliers to Apple Inc (AAPL.O) have begun manufacturing a lower-priced version of its hot-selling iPhone 4 with a smaller 8 gigabyte flash drive, according to two people with knowledge of the matter.

The Macalope still marvels that outfits like Reuters are now in the Apple rumor biz. The horny one’s so old that he remembers when Apple rumors came from 1984evah@eworld.com. Reuters is so serious! Look, they even got confirmation from a second source—isn’t that cute?!

Guys, guys, these are Apple rumors! Don’t bust a gut. No one else does.

So, the lower-cost iPhone is just an iPhone 4 with less memory? What happened to the iPhone nano that was going to be thinner, smaller, and prepaid? Naturally, the Infallibility of Apple Rumor Makers principle will be invoked here. Sure, they said it would be those things, but they also said it would be cheaper, so the rumor sites were right!

Next up, the Wall Street Journal!

No, really! Apple rumors is the crazy new dance that’s sweeping the nation!

Sprint Nextel Corp. will begin selling the new version of the Apple iPhone in mid-October, people familiar with the matter said, filling a huge hole in the No. 3 U.S. carrier’s lineup and giving Apple Inc. another sales channel for its popular gadget.

Wow. So, assuming these are both true—which is still not a given, but they do come from reputable publications—one might reasonably think that Apple could expect to see a nice uptick in market share, right? Or is the iPhone still DOOOMED like it was when the week opened? It’s so hard to keep track.

Really, the Macalope could give a rip about market share. Personally, he’s just concerned that the iPhone continues to offer a better user experience, and that Apple stays in business to keep making cool stuff. So, for the former, it’s good that Google’s there to offer an alternative and to keep pushing Apple on things like notifications. As for the latter, that’s hardly a problem.

In trying to prove that Google was “winning,” Matt Asay linked to this piece, which speculates that Android could bring Google up to $2 billion dollars in revenue next year. $2 billion?! Wow! That’s huge!

Well, it’s huge compared to what you make from those crocheted Mac mini cozies you sell on Etsy (which are adorable, but, the Macalope must point out, block the fan and cause the mini to overheat). Compared to what Apple makes, however, it’s chump change. In the most recent quarter, Apple made $13.3 billion in revenue from the iPhone alone. And yet Asay wants you to think that Google making up to 4 percent of what Apple makes is “winning.” In a normal universe that would be considered insane. In this universe it’s considered “analysis.”

The only advantage the Macalope can see from the iPhone overtaking Android in market share is getting silly pundits to finally shut up about this ridiculous yardstick they’re carrying around.

[Editors’ Note: In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.]

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