The Macalope: He's an ideas guy

Hey, who likes Apple acquisition fan fiction?!

No one, that’s who.

Alas, word of this has not reached Minyanville’s Sean Udall, who asks, “Should Apple buy BlackBerry?”

Take it away, Betteridge’s Law of Headlines!

No.

Thank you, Betteridge’s Law of Headlines!

It’s not as crazy as it might look at first glance …

That’s as may be, but rest assured: It’s still substantially crazy. Crazy bananas kind of crazy.

The more I look at the evolution of the smartphone space and what will surely be a highly disruptive (and AWESOME) wearable entry in Google Glass …

Surely.

… the more I think a simply brilliant move by Apple would be to buy BlackBerry.

The more that the Macalope reads this article the more he thinks it might either be performance art or a desperate plea for help. How one jumps from Google Glass, the quintessential first-adopter device with no broad appeal in its current state, to Apple buying BlackBerry is a feat of logical gymnastics that may cause nausea and vomiting. See if you can follow Udall’s “logic” without losing your lunch.

Turns out, Google Glass uses data and corporations are concerned about the security of their data! No, it’s true! So, in order to cut Google Glass off at the enterprise pass, Apple should buy BlackBerry because security.

And that’s it.

Look, writing good fan fiction is hard!

Apparently.

This would create a nearly unassailable device entry in the enterprise segment: Apple’s ease of use with BlackBerry’s security.

Except Apple is already the most secure choice of the modern, viable alternatives. Of which BlackBerry is not one.

Now do I think this is probable? Not at all. But I do think it’s possible …

Thanks for stating the obvious about probability.

… and as stated above, I think this would be a master stroke for Apple.

The Macalope is always charmed by the hubris in these statements: “I, who write for a website, have this brilliant idea, but Apple, which makes billions of dollars a year selling wildly successful products and is the second largest company in the world, is too stupid to act on it.”

Pundits are so cute when they lack any kind of self-awareness!

Bottom line, the more I look the more I think this deal would be insanely great!

Or, really, just “insane.” Close, though!

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