All things being unequal: It makes comparing iPhones easier

Macalope

Turns you that you can make comparisons between iPhones so much easier with this one weird trick.

Writing for The Boy Genius Report, Zach Epstein says all you iPhone 7 owners are saps.

“If you have an iPhone 7, you got the wrong iPhone.”

SON.

Today marks exactly five months since Apple first released the iPhone 7 and iPhone 7 Plus. Five months since Apple officially changed its iPhone strategy, reusing the same design on a non-“S” model smartphone for the first time ever.

They look exactly the same! Except where they don’t, in color and the placement of the antenna lines. So, exactly the same.

…it has become increasingly clear to me… there is a right iPhone to buy and a wrong iPhone.

If — now, stay with me here — you ignore one phone’s advantages. Turns out that if you put a hand over one eye, it can literally change your perception. By taking away depth. Who knew it would have that kind of effect? Other than, say, optometrists, ophthalmologists and, possibly, owls?

Epstein rightly lauds the iPhone 7 Plus’s battery, camera and screen. But he conveniently leaves a few things out of his equation in his rush to crown a king of the iPhones.

In the end, the iPhone 7 Plus is clearly the iPhone Apple wants in customers’ hands.

The one that costs more has more features, you’re saying. Fascinating. It’s almost as if there’s some kind of correlation between cost and feature set. Probably not, though, since Epstein doesn’t mention prices in his piece at all.

The only compromise with the iPhone 7 Plus is comfort…

Is convenience the same as comfort? At any rate, here’s the other compromise: The iPhone 7 Plus starts at $769. The iPhone 7 starts at $649.

The horny one now feels obliged to point out that his beloved iPhone SE starts at just $399, albeit at just 16 GB of storage. Still, just $50 more gives you 64 GB, twice the amount of storage of the base models of either the iPhone 7 or 7 Plus. And, it gets better battery life than the iPhone 7, too. It’s almost as if any of the iPhones could be the best iPhone depending on your requirements and preferences. Very strange!

When the reportedly $1,000+ iPhone 8 comes out, it will be interesting to see if The Boy Genius Report sticks with their “Damn the cost!” methodology. Something to keep an eye on.

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