The MacalopeMacworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.

Past tense: All about the Apple Watch failure

From the go-to guy for Apple failure.

Survey fever: Don’t catch it

Surveys on the popularity of Apple products are often not worth the pixels they appear on.

You’re doing it wrong: A negative Watch review, hold the hate

Turns out you can write a negative opinion about the Apple Watch without being ridiculously over the top. Who knew?

Not for everyone: You don’t have to like the Apple Watch

If someone else wants one, that's not a reflection on you.

Survey sickness: Smartphone surveys are not all created equal

Read the fine print on smartphone surveys before you start to panic.

The exploding dud: Not liking the Apple Watch doesn’t make it a failure

There's a basic problem with statistics going on here.

Futile exercises: The Apple Watch is bad at what it’s not designed to do

Who knew the Apple Watch couldn't do what it's not supposed to do?

Macbeth syndrome: Killing the Mac won't stop the voices

There are easier ways to focus.

The replacements: Apple is not a game of fantasy baseball

Your personal picks to replace Tim Cook don't matter.

Striking twice: Yet another breakup note to the Apple Watch

The column that will have you yelling "COUP DE FOUDRE!" even though you don't know what it means.

Problem time: Things are only an issue when Apple gets involved

New Apple streaming music service? Must be time to complain about streaming music services.

Air puppets: Apple punditry's tiresome trio

Dvorak, Enderle and Lyons. Oh, why?

The comeback kid: Always bet on Black... Berry

Note: Do not actually bet on BlackBerry.

Assumption junction: Calling Apple a religion has no function

Apple is definitely making a car and it will definitely fail. Sure.

Express yourself: But why does it always have to be about Apple?

Because everything is Apple's fault is why.