The MacalopeMacworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.

Macalope

One or the other: Apple's either doomed or destroyer

Business Insider just wants to sell stories of winners and losers.

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Redefining 'better': It now means 'worse'

Crappy device is surely better because it's cheap.

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Too much book learning: Convincing yourself Apple's doomed

Apple's numbers this quarter were great. It must be hiding something.

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The Apple Watch watch: More predictions of doom

Still going to be a flop, if you want to know.

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Finally: How good news for Apple is bad news for Apple

The analysis of Apple's quarterly results you were waiting for.

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Apple's missing out on X: Where X is whatever isn't shipping yet

Apple isn't shipping this year's not-ready-to-ship technology!

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The doom train: Nothing can stop Apple doom

All aboard! No record results can keep the Apple doom train from making its scheduled stops!

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The blame game: Everything is Apple's fault

Do you even have to ask?

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Goal posts of the imagination: Innovation means shipping

Microsoft makes some cool demos. Call the Macalope when they ship.

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The bogeyphone: A threat to Apple that isn't

Another wacky idea, another imaginary threat to Apple.

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Never say never again: Putting words in Steve Jobs' mouth continues apace

Jobs' thoughts brought to you by the people who understood him least.

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Those who do not study history: Apple devices are usually different

We know the Apple Watch will stink because all current smartwatches stink. QED.

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Supremely wrong: Getting the iPhone wrong at its birth

Looking back at some of the worst reaction to the iPhone's announcement eight years ago.

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Dead already: Future Apple products never stand a chance

Why does Apple even bother making new products when they all come pre-failed?

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Things we know for sure: The thoughts of Steve Jobs are not in this set

Few people know what Steve Jobs might have thought about things. They certainly aren't your average pundits.