The MacalopeMacworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.

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Zombie services: Apple Pay surprisingly not dead

Apple Pay killer CurrentC, on the other hand, is pretty much dead.

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Car trouble: The Apple car deemed a non-starter

Doesn't matter if it doesn't exist yet.

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Wait a second: The Watch is for more people than just you

Just because you don't need one, doesn't mean it's a failure.

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The old standards: Still playing those hated hits

Apple can't make a car because it's hard!

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Tantrums as a service: Ruining an otherwise worthwhile rant

So much fine criticism of Apple goes to waste when it gets buried in hair pulling.

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Surprise: A funny thing happened on the way to the fail

Turns out the iPhone SE isn't a failure after all.

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Piping those dreams: Android wins it all

It's only a matter of time.

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Simple answers: They’re for simple people

Who would you replace Tim Cook with?

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Start making sense: In your Apple criticism

Criticism is fine, but ranting isn't helpful.

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A bad quarter for Apple: Is a great one for anyone else

Falling sales are never good, but it's not all doom and gloom.

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Over-the-top: Making your Apple Watch diatribe stand out

Higher. Higher. Maximum hyperbole.

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Disservice: Ignoring Apple’s efforts

When you throw out a lot of Apple's services, they hardly have any at all.

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Killing it: Apple isn’t killing the Mac

The source of this thought is reason enough to know it's bogus.

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Rosencrantz and Goldilocks are dead: Who would want an iPhone SE?

People who want smaller screens are people, too, you know.

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Lasting: iPhones tend to stick around

You may not keep using it, but someone will.