The MacalopeMacworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.

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Congenital misunderstanding: Apple confounds Wall Street

Be prepared for spit-takes reading these quotes.

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Most personal: Your Apple Watch mileage may vary

One bad Apple Watch experience don't spoil the whole bunch. Girl.

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Chump change: Throwing Apple’s money around

It's touching how concerned people are about Apple's buying options.

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Known unknowns: All about the iPhone 7

How dare Apple force us to choose?

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Yeah, that’ll happen: Cats still don’t like dogs

Apple's, uh, not likely to license Samsung Pay.

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Storegate: Apple’s new store spells doom

The decline and fall of the Apple empire... is not happening right now.

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Android wins again: Future features beat Apple every time

Why does Apple even bother making new iPhones when future Android phones always win?

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Bored now: iPhone kittens turn into iPhone cats

It can't be the summer of 2007 forever.

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If you don't have anything nice to say: Don’t drag Steve Jobs into it

Jobs liked flashy Apple Stores. Get over it.

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Jumping the gun: Rumors are not plans

And rumors are no reason to start flipping tables.

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Zombie services: Apple Pay surprisingly not dead

Apple Pay killer CurrentC, on the other hand, is pretty much dead.

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Car trouble: The Apple car deemed a non-starter

Doesn't matter if it doesn't exist yet.

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Wait a second: The Watch is for more people than just you

Just because you don't need one, doesn't mean it's a failure.

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The old standards: Still playing those hated hits

Apple can't make a car because it's hard!