The MacalopeMacworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.

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Rosencrantz and Goldilocks are dead: Who would want an iPhone SE?

People who want smaller screens are people, too, you know.

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Lasting: iPhones tend to stick around

You may not keep using it, but someone will.

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Down is up: Security is unsafe

Only by creating back door operating systems can we truly be safe.

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If it bleeds: Making Apple Watch headlines

There are good things to report about the Apple Watch and this one bad thing. What to do?

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Scared straight: The iPhone hacking fear that wasn’t

Fortune misreads its own poll.

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An appointment with disappointment: Reaction to the iPhone SE is predictable

Who had "disappointment" in the pool? Everyone? OK.

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Empty inside: The iPhone SE or our souls?

The iPhone SE is no good. Nothing is.

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Lawful conduct: Using the courts is not being above the law

Using lawyers within the law is kind of how the system works.

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It’s a two-party system: One offers better security

Even if the FBI did unlock an iPhone, Apple's still your best bet.

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Unspecified results: Threatening Apple with… something

If this year's iPhones aren't amazing then... er...

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Do-nothings: Apple needs to ship more hot garbage

Cutting your customers on sharp edges is clearly the only viable strategy.

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Unwanted: Every iPhone until now

Apple has long listened to customers. If only when it suited them.

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Market dumbnamics: Apple always goes out of business

Isn't it weird how that happens every couple of years?

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Expectation overload: Grading the Apple Watch on a bad curve

It can't be very successful if not literally everyone is wearing one.

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Lesson unlearned: Apple behind yet again

If we can't see it, they must not be working in it.