iOS

Skewed-o-morphism: The Apple Pencil meets its match

Skeuomorphism is when an object imitates the design of a similar artifact. Skewed-o-morphism is when you go insane in the membrane for skeuomorphism.

Writing for The Verge, Vlad Savov declares “Samsung’s Staedtler stylus is roughly 5,000 times more awesome than the Apple Pencil.” (Tip o’ the antlers to Phil Heywood.)

Roughly. Look, this isn’t an exact science. In fact, it’s not a science at all. It’s more of an art. Well, it’s not that, either. It’s pablum, is what it is.

Read more »

0

iOS

The iPhone H8: Gonna be so boring

The Macalope is sorry to report that Apple will be shipping another iPhone this year. Ugh. Sorry.

Writing for the Forbes contributor network and cut-rate bar mitzvah DJ training academy, Ewan Spence tells us how the “Disappointing iPhone 8 Leaks Are Key To Apple's Boring Success.” (Tip o’ the antlers to SamT, David V, Philip Speicher and @JonyIveParody.)

Dullesville, Calif. Population: Apple. Main exports: these boring iPhones no one likes.

Read more »

0

iOS

Past isn’t prologue: Apple isn’t today’s Microsoft

Remember how iOS versus Android was just like the Mac versus Windows? Well, if you loved that old hit… you’re probably reading the wrong column. But pundits have a new spin on it that still makes no sense: Apple is Microsoft!

See, they were Apple and got trounced by Microsoft and they were going to be Apple again but this time get trounced by Google but instead they’re Microsoft. It all makes sense when you read this pamphlet and relinquish all your worldly possessions.

Writing for the Forbes contributor network and incurable myopia clinic, Adam Hartung describes “Tim Cook's 'Ballmer-ization' Of Apple.” (Tip o’ the antlers to @JonyIveParody.)

Read more »

0

iOS

Timeflop: The iPhone 8 has pre-problems

Rumors about this year’s bumper crop of iPhones are starting to emerge and if you were worried that no one would tell us what’s wrong with them, never fear, the fine people and Javascript ads and Where’s Waldo enthusiasts at Business Insider are on it.

“The iPhone 8 will likely have wireless charging—but that could make it prone to overheating.” (Tip o’ the antlers to @designheretic.)

IT’LL NEVER WORK.

Read more »

0