Peeling an onion: Phony iPhone 6 doom starts a chain reaction

2014 is over, but the Macalope is still cleaning up the mess from the crappiest New Year’s Eve party ever. Because as 2014 wound down, tech sites got wound up about some survey results.

“Here’s Proof That Samsung Owners Are Happier With Their Phones Than iPhone Owners” (indirect link and tip o’ the antlers to mylestaylor)

Business Insider‘s Julie Bort knows the score: It’s Samsung a billion and Apple zero. Or, well, 81 to 79, according to the American Customer Satisfaction Index.

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The problem factory: Where Apple problems get manufactured

We’re close to the end of yet another year, but take heart! Some silly pundits made progress this year! Take Business Insider’s Jay Yarow, for example, who no longer believes market share is a problem for Apple. No, he just believes the perception of market share is a problem for Apple. OK, it’s pretty minimal progress but still...

“Apple Executives Apparently Think The Data Used To Measure Smartphone Market Share Is Garbage” (indirect link and a tip o’ the antlers to Steve Boothe)

Actually, what Apple says is “off the mark,” but you can’t write a Business Insider headline without BLAZZLEFROZZLE.

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White elephant: There's a reason they give this advice away

Just like that tacky sweater your mom got you in 1997 that everyone keeps re-gifting, Forbes is the gift that keeps on giving.

And speaking of giving, Eric Jackson doesn’t think Apple should be giving money back to shareholders.

“Apple Returns Cash To Shareholders Because It’s Out Of Ideas On How To Invest It” (indirect link and tip o’ the antlers to weid1)

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