How low can you go?

The Macalope , Macworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.
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Writing for ZDNet, Ken Hess reports in from the home office in Crazytown, USA.

“Where’s Apple’s ‘Chromebook’? The need for a cheap Apple product” (tip o’ the antlers to Chris Breen).

If you own any Apple devices, it’s likely that you didn’t buy them at a significant discount or at a cost savings. It’s obvious from Apple’s earliest days that its founders didn’t care much for the low cost market, but I think that’s about to change and the humble Chromebook is the breaking point product.

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Same old refrain

The Macalope , Macworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.
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Business Insider is a publication at war with itself. While BI’s Jay Yarow has finally admitted the obvious, that Apple kinda knows what it’s doing and smartphone market share is not the be-all end-all of measurements, Jim Edwards seems to be happily sailing along in a logical bubble, impervious to outside thought.

“Ugly Data For Apple Shows How Desperately It Needs iPhone 6 To Be A Hit” (no link but tip o’ the antlers to Rob Wensing).

Apple may be the most successful, envied tech company on the planet. But its dominance is far from obvious according to new data from IDC, which tracks worldwide smartphone shipments.

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7

It is to laugh

The Macalope , Macworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.
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PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: You asked for it, we made it: For a limited time you can get an “I’m the Macalope” mug! Because who is the Macalope? We all are.

Get set for hilarious hijinks as pundits line up to tell us how the next iPhone can’t help Apple, what the next iPads must have, and how awesome Windows Phone is doing, whoops, it’s not at all.

Fun with false equivalencies

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21

Blame Apple

The Macalope , Macworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.
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Turns out there’s an easy way to handle your company’s poor earnings report: Just blame Apple!

“JB Hi-Fi clobbered by a falling iPad” (no link but tip o’ the antlers to Gwilym Lucas).

Who is responsible for the 7 per cent fall in JB Hi-Fi’s share price? The real culprit is Apple.

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14

Market share sandwich

The Macalope , Macworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.
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It's comforting that in this day of a strangely changing narrative about Apple, one can still find people who'll make a big fuss about market share. Even if it is goofballs from Goofball Central (Seeking Alpha) and Goofball High (Forbes).

In between we'll look at the iPhone 6! (Actual iPhone 6 not included.)

AROOOOGA!

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20

Coming up lame

The Macalope , Macworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.
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Thank goodness for a steady supply of sweet, crunchy alfalfa because it’s slim pickings this week for the Macalope. With Samsung’s bad quarterly results, the rise in Apple’s share price over the last few months and all the attention on iPhone 6 rumors, it’s hard for a mythical creature to find something to sink his teeth into.

Sure, he could look at the pronouncements that the larger of the upcoming iPhones (that we totally know for sure are coming) is “delayed” because Apple blah blah sapphire wacka wacka supply chain doing doing bonk.

Fortunately, we can always count on The Register to turn the shrill up to 11. Or 12. Or infinity.

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12

Bizarro Insider

The Macalope , Macworld

In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.
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Hang on to your figurative and possibly literal hats, as today the Macalope brings a strange, fantastic tale of unbelievable Apple punditry!

Writing for Business Insider—also known as anti-Apple central—Jay Yarow says “It’s Pretty Clear That Apple Is Winning The War With Samsung” (tip o’ the antlers to Daniel Domene)

Yes, the twists and turns on this ride are so intense they may cause nausea and the need to question all you hold to be true!

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