Finally: How good news for Apple is bad news for Apple

You knew it was only a matter of time but, yes, someone has finally written a piece on how Apple’s blockbuster quarterly results are actually bad news for the company.

Writing for the Forbes contributor network, Steven Rosenbaum explains “Why Apple’s Profits Could Face A Steep Cliff”

And we should totally take Rosenbaum’s analysis seriously because a year and a half ago, he was the guy who asked “Is Google Glass A Siri Killer?” and he was obviously right about that.

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Apple's missing out on X: Where X is whatever isn't shipping yet

The world of technology moves quickly and to stay ahead, one must constantly ride the waves of whatever’s coming next. This is why Apple is always behind and perpetually chastised for failing to deliver tomorrow’s technology today.

Wait, what?

“Right Now, Apple Risks Missing Out On The Next Big Thing In Technology” (tip o’ the antlers to @mylestaylor)

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The doom train: Nothing can stop Apple doom

Choo-choo! Apple reported record results this week, but that doom train keeps on a-chugging along! Donning the engineer’s cap is Forbes “contributor” Peter Cohan.

“6 Reasons Apple Is Still More Doomed Than You Think” (tip o’ the antlers to Carlton Swift)

You know, tax season is coming up. Is it possible to write off “contributions” from the Forbes “contributor” network? The Macalope shall have to remember to ask his accountant, Amy.

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The blame game: Everything is Apple's fault

Welcome to the world of Internet tech coverage. The big, stupid, stinky onion that is the world of Internet tech coverage.

The outside layer of this onion is benign. In this case, it’s an interview by the Telegraph with former Motorola CEO Dennis Woodside, who conducted Google’s $12.5 billion purchase of the company. [Correction: an earlier version of this story called Woodside the "architect" but that is not correct. Andy Rubin seems to have arranged the deal from Google's side while Woodside carried it out for the company.] This is the plain brown wrapper in which we will find the eye-watering mess that is the heart of Internet tech coverage.

This piece was picked up by Engadget, which extracts this from the interview:

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Goal posts of the imagination: Innovation means shipping

Let’s go back in time seven years. That was when the Macalope first wrote this:

It’s amazing how future Microsoft products beat current Apple products time and time again, isn’t it? You’d think Apple would have just given up by now.

That was in response to contentions that Windows Mobile 7 (which later shipped as Windows Phone) would crush the iPhone. Not that that context has anything to do with what we’re about to talk about. Cough.

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