||This is the official iPhone/iPod Touch application of The Onion, America's Finest News Source. It is the last bastion of unbiased, reliable, and definitive news in a world dominated by superficiality, mediocrity, and non-Onion news outlets.
• Get the latest from The Onion with nearly all the content you've come to depend on for your survival including news, sports, American Voices, Statshots, Infographics, columns, and more
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The Onion was founded in 1756, when Friedrich Siegfried Zweibel, an immigrant tuber-farmer from Prussia, shrewdly bartered a sack of yams for a second-hand printing press and named his fledgling newspaper The Mercantile Onion after the only words of English that he knew. Today, The Onion misinforms more than 7 million readers in print and online each month. Become number 7,000,001. Download this app.