Remains of the Day: iPhone home

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Tired of iPhone rumors? Let me make this easy for you: It’s coming out sometime, at a place, with lots of new features for a certain price! There, done. Now unless you’re interested in the latest developments in the case of the lost prototype or how Apple’s former CEO destroyed the fabric of comics, you don’t even have to read the remainders for Monday, September 26, 2011.

October iPhone Event to Be Held on Apple Campus (All Things D)

As September draws to a close, whispers of an October Apple event have only intensified. All Things D’s John Paczkowski says that the company’s rumored song-and-dance will take place not at its usual fall venue in San Francisco, but on Apple’s campus. We suspect it’s just in case newly-installed CEO Tim Cook decides he needs to demonstrate his power by triggering the trap doors installed underneath journalists’ seats.

Rumor: Next iPhone to feature powerful Assistant, 1 GB of RAM (TUAW)

Speaking of iPhone 5 rumors, a couple of sites have reported on what the new handset might bring. Among the suggestions are a souped-up voice-control system with a clever new digital “assistant” and a bump to 1GB of RAM. Surprisingly, nobody seems to have caught on to the device’s most controversial feature: instant disintegration of your now obsolete iPhone 4.

For lost iPhone, SFPD wants bar’s surveillance video (CNet)

If you’re not tired of iPhone 5 sorta news yet, the mysterious case of the maybe-lost/maybe-stolen prototype continues. The owner of the bar where the iPhone is said to have gone missing has claimed that the San Francisco police asked for surveillance footage from the night of the rumored theft, making this sure to be yet another case solved by those immortal four words: “Zoom in. Now enhance.”

What Are Apple’s Icons Doing on Samsung’s Wall of Apps? (All Things D)

It’s hard to imagine what would lead Apple to believe that Samsung is copying its designs. I mean, it’s not like the South Korea-based company is stupid—it’s not about to go around and plaster Apple app icons on the wall of its new store in Italy or anything.

Curved cover glass to be popular among handheld devices (DigiTimes)

The ever-reliable Taiwanese trade publication DigiTimes (Motto: “All the news that’s fit to print on the Internet, which really doesn’t have standards, per se”) says that Apple may be introducing an iPhone with a curved glass screen in 2012. Which sounds futuristic until you remember that it wasn’t that long ago that all of our TVs had curved glass screens.

Cartooning vs. Technology: How Steve Jobs Ruined Comics (Tom Pappalardo)

Steve Jobs can add another bullet point to his CV: ruining comics. That’s according to cartoonist Tom Pappalardo, who points out that the advent of generically-shaped technological devices with a slew of purposes has made it tougher to depict certain topics in the simplified manner that cartoonists favor. Finally, an explanation of why most of the comics in my local paper don’t seem so funny anymore!

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