The Macalope Daily: War is hell

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There was bad news last week for Apple on two fronts of its patent war with Android. Guess this means Apple’s lawyers won’t be home for Christmas. Damn this patent war!

First the company had its injunction on the Samsung Galaxy Tab in Australia lifted; then a German court ruled that the iPhone and iPad infringe on Motorola’s patents.

Presumably, Google will put a stop to these lawsuits once its acquisition of Motorola is complete, since it looks down on companies “responding with lawsuits” instead of “responding with innovation.” Surely those weren’t just idle words and hahahaha oh, man, no, the Macalope can’t say that with a straight face.

In fairness to Google, its argument is “They started it!” So there’s that. Which would be legally binding in any court of law comprised solely of students from Mrs. McGillicutty’s second-grade class at PS 138.

Now, Microsoft—having worked hard in the 1990s and presently feeling content to enjoy its retirement from the technology rat race while sitting around the pool sipping drinks with umbrellas in them—has made itself a nice business by licensing patents to Android OEMs. Apple, though, has almost exclusively decided to fight it out.

Almost exclusively, the Macalope says. Because, interestingly enough, Apple did license its “scrollback” patent to IBM and Nokia and had offered to license it to Samsung a year ago. Possibly the offer to license was for nine kajillion dollars—which the Macalope knows is a made-up number—but let’s just say a move like that wouldn’t be completely out of Apple’s wheelhouse.

It’s easy to get caught up in every little battle, but these are all just skirmishes in the greater Patent War to End All Patent Wars.

Which, of course, will not end patent wars at all.

So, try not to worry too much.

[Editors’ Note: Each week the Macalope skewers the worst of the week’s coverage of Apple and other technology companies. In addition to being a mythical beast, the Macalope is not an employee of Macworld. As a result, the Macalope is always free to criticize any media organization. Even ours.]

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