Few TV shows have captured the imagination of viewers as much as Survivor, the hit show that pits 16 contestants against nature–and each other–on a tropical isle. The show divides the contestants into tribes, which compete in contests of skill. Each week the losing tribe votes to expel a member from the island, until only one remains–the hearty individual who has bested personal politicking, petty bickering, and the occasional meal of grilled rat to reign as sole survivor. But why not populate the island with computer-industry heavyweights? After all, who’s more familiar with personal politicking, petty bickering, and vermin than the titans of Silicon Valley?–Philip Michaels
APPLE TRIBEJohn Sculley, Apple CEO 1983-93 Assets: Brings an almost limitless supply of Pepsi. Liabilities: Obsession with crafting a crude handheld device out of a hollowed-out coconut. Gil Amelio, Apple CEO 1996-97 Assets: Helped turn around the last island he was marooned on. Liabilities: First thing he does is lay off 25 percent of the cabana boys and cut back on everyone’s rice rations.
Steve Jobs, Apple CEO Assets: So resilient that even if he’s voted off, he’ll return later in the role of interim tribe member. Liabilities: Stubbornly refuses to stay in tribe’s hut until it’s translucent and candy colored.
Steve Wozniak, Apple cofounder Assets: Uses technical know-how to build bamboo-encased Macs for each team member–out of his parents’ cave. Liabilities: Keeps falling for Jobs’s “I won’t vote you off the island if you don’t vote me off the island” ploy.
SILICON TRIBEBill Gates, Microsoft founder Assets: In exchange for support from other tribe members, he offers to buy them their own island. Liabilities: Builds haphazardly erected huts that mimic Apple tribe’s design but periodically tip over.
Steve Ballmer, Microsoft CEO Assets: Harnesses motivational tools of screaming and derision to drive his teammates to excel. Liabilities: You’ve all read Lord of the Flies, right?
Larry Ellison, Oracle CEO Assets: Uses cunning private investigators to dig up dirt on rivals and teammates. Liabilities: Inexplicable fear of wicker.
Steve Case, America Online CEO Assets: Has the financial resources to buy the island and turn it into an AOL subsidiary. Liabilities: Justice Department blocks his attempt to merge competing tribes into a single entity.