The Macalope Daily: Same time next year


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It may be a new year, but if the punditry of the waning days of 2012 is any indication then we’re in for the same old malarkey.

And when the Macalope say the same old malarkey, he means exactly the same. Forbes must have run out of ideas late last year because it decided to keep publishing the same “Why I’m possibly leaving Apple but haven’t decided yet, but better write this up now because, let’s face it, like I’m going to leave the best smartphone.”

“Why I Might Drop the iPhone 5 for the Galaxy Note II, and you should too.” (No link, bien sûr.)

Yes, writing for Forbes, Ed Zitron wants to tell you why you should might drop the iPhone 5, too! Another triumph for Forbes’s crack copyediting staff.

At least Patrick Moorhead had the good taste to note that his flirtation with leaving the iPhone was because of his personal needs and not likely to apply to a general audience. Zitron’s only nod in that direction is noting that the reason he likes the stylus is because he “might just have strange hands.”

The Macalope’s not sure how that resolves to the title’s insistence that readers should also might leave the iPhone for the Galaxy Note II, but in the Macalope’s opinion, if you dig a stylus on a smartphone, it’s probably not your hands that are the problem.

What else does Zitron have against the iPhone 5, other than its lack of a stylus?

Searching for an email I’d sent only fifteen minutes [ago] previously was impossible.

The Macalope’s not saying that going to Mailboxes, then the mail account in question, and then the Sent folder is the easiest of workflows, but it’s not exactly impossible, either.

All in all, Apple has fallen behind the curve. After trying the Galaxy Note II for two weeks, it’s clear that Android Jellybean (4.1) has managed to pull ahead.

Moorhead, on the other hand, considers the current state of Android “nearly as good as iOS.” So, let’s just say that unreasonable minds who write for Forbes disagree on the subject.

If you’ve ever struggled penning a semi-to-long note on the iPhone 4S or 5, you’ll know it’s not pleasant.

“Penning” a long note on the iPhone at all is pretty much next to impossible. Keying one isn’t easy, true, but the speech-to-text in iOS 6 is pretty good, and most people don’t need or even want to type long notes on their phones.

All in all, and in the most weird, ironic manner, iOS 6 feels like a tablet operating system squeezed onto a phone.

As opposed to an actual tablet squeezed into a phone like the Note.

When I have the real estate of swiping across a 7.9″ or 9.7″ tablet and the time to do so, iOS feels relaxed and perfect for it. When I need to get something done, iOS feels like it’s in the way.

Do you have hands the size of ham hocks or something? Because the Macalope has no idea what you’re talking about here. Having used both Android and iOS, he would say this is exactly backwards (which is probably not surprising, or we wouldn’t be having this conversation). But, if anything, we’re constantly being told how simplistic iOS is and how it should get widgets and animated backgrounds and more open and giant flying buttresses to support the weight of aircraft-carrier-sized phones. Now it’s too difficult. Too difficult for “you, too.”

Which gets to the heart of the Macalope’s problem with this piece. He would never begrudge Zitron his choice of giant, stylus-bearing phone. Enjoy! We will be across the bar laughing at you, but enjoy!

The problem is suggesting that everyone else should do the same. Again, this pretty much comes from the title, so this could all be the fault of one sick or sad individual working the copy desk at Forbes, desperately trying to drum up hits or simply unclear on what words mean. Whatever the case, 2013 looks like it’ll bring more of the same, in case you were worried.

That was rhetorical. The Macalope knows you weren’t worried.

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