The Macalope: Look Who's Talking, Part Infinity


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America’s most adorable ragamuffin is back and still proving the age-old adage that “goofy co-founders say the darndest things.”

Yes, Wired’s Mat Honan interviewed Steve Wozniak and, once again, wackiness ensued.

“Steve Wozniak: Apple Should Make an Android Phone”

At the Apps World North America conference in San Francisco, Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak gave WIRED a wide-ranging interview, touching on everything from his preferred iPhone 5s color (he has all three) …

Oh, he’s that guy.

… to the fictional operating system in the movie Her.

But no one goes to the spectacle that is interviewing Steve Wozniak for measured insight. No, they go for the spectacular crashes of logic about how Apple should be doing business.

But his most interesting comment by far was a heretical recommendation for his former company: Apple, he thinks, should release an Android handset.

Wait, is crazy talk heretical? Well, they did get Joan of Arc that way, so … guess so.

“There’s nothing that would keep Apple out of the Android market as a secondary phone market,” said Wozniak–who, it should be noted …

Is actually made up of a dozen trained pomeranians, furiously working a Rube Goldberg machine inside a Woz suit.

… is no longer involved in the day-to-day workings of the company.

That too.

“We …”

And yet he still refers to himself and the company in the first person plural.

… could compete very well. People like the precious looks of stylings and manufacturing that we do in our product compared to the other Android offerings. We could play in two arenas at the same time.”

Translation: “I have no idea what has made Apple successful in the last 15 years. Is it magic? I think it might be magic.”

Wozniak now says he never said it.

Hmm. Well, that might be easier to believe if insane bees didn’t come flying out of your mouth every time you opened it.

Let’s be clear: Woz does this all the time.

“Steve Wozniak’s Reaction To Surface Tablet: ‘Steve Jobs Was Reincarnated At Microsoft’”

“Wozniak Endorses Windows Phone, Says Lumia 900 the Reincarnation of Steve Jobs”

“Apple co-founder Wozniak calls firm ‘arrogant’, slams iPhone 5 design”

It’s how he entertains himself. He says something incendiary about Apple and the tech press covers it as if there is some kind of hidden meaning behind his words. But Woz’s comments simply express the desires of one technophile. They certainly don’t express the measured opinion of an adept business manager, something he’s never claimed or been credited to be.

The Woz interview is a game both Woz and the tech press play, a game in which they attempt to transform sound into fury. That’s all.

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