Let’s do it again: One iPhone killer dies, another is born

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It’s hard to believe it’s been a year since the Essential phone was first teased, heralding an avalanche of unbridled enthusiam as pundits pointedly predicted its iPhone-killing ability.

The Verge called it an “incredibly audacious and ambitious project” before it even launched. And, to be fair, it launched almost two months late so The Verge was right because “over-ambitious” is a kind of “ambitious.”

Anyway, how’d that all turn out? Surely everyone has tossed their iPhones into the lake and is using the Essential phone now with its amazing “thing” it was going to have that no iPhone had whatever that turned out to be.

“Android Creator Puts Essential Up for Sale, Cancels Next Phone.”

Huh. Well, that was anticlimactic. And entirely predictable.

At least we’ve learned our lesson about making predictions about smartphones we haven’t even seen yet and how they’re going to dominate the iPhooohhhhhh noooooo…

“Pixel 3: Google’s 2018 flagship could finally win over some Apple loyalists.”

Just checking and, nope, apparently we have not. Writing for The International Business Times, Sami Khan is shoving us back on the punditry merry-go-round despite the fact that we think we’re going to boot from having ridden it too many times already.

OK, but you’re cleaning up the congealed mixture of chewed-up elephant ear stuck together with cotton candy goo, Sami. That’s on you.

Successor to the current-gen Pixel phones will arrive later this year, and noted designer Ben Geskin has illustrated the potential design of the Pixel 3 (or Pixel 2018) based on an Android P card depicting an unseen smartphone.

This drawing of this thing that might be the thing that ships later looks awesome and I say a lot of people are going to want it instead of the thing currently shipping from the other company.

It doesn’t get any more rock-solid than that, folks.

There haven’t been any substantial leaks about the Pixel 3 so far, but this reimagined render looks plausible…

But we’re the ones who are religious fanatics, say the people who run around looking for the miraculous images of iPhone-killers in operating system betas. “Does this image a Guatemalan man found burned into his toast depict an upcoming iPhone killer? STORY.”

The main feature of this holy relic is it has a very small bezel and no notch. Khan insinuates that this might be thanks to the same fingerprint-reader-under-screen technology found in a Vivo concept phone. Got that? From unidentified image in an operating system beta to unshipped technology to iPhone killer.

If you hold up these images in just this fashion under the light of a midnight moon while standing in a spruce forest, you can clearly see the Apple doom. This time it’ll happen for sure. Finally.

  
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