Annual festivities: iPhone production cut rumors may be nigh

The annual silly season may soon be upon us.

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Happy Production Cutmas Eve to those who celebrate!

What the heck is Production Cutmas, you ask? Why, it is the annual celebration of iPhone production cuts that people freak out about almost every year, usually beginning in December and then running into January.

The Macalope hasn’t seen any reports of this yet, but it’s likely because iPhones were released later this year than they have been in previous years. Surely it will be announced tomorrow or the next day or the day after. It’s technically possible Production Cutmas will be canceled this year (stupid pandemic!), but if history is any lesson then we should get rumors sometime soon of absolutely gargantuan iPhone production cuts happening because no one likes iPhones.

The real reason for production cuts, of course, is that Apple ramps up production for the fall iPhone launch and then scales it back after the early demand wanes a bit. For some reason this perfectly logical explanation is thrown out the window so analysts can get in the holiday spirit and make outlandish claims about soft iPhone demand and how Apple will be going out of business any day now because iPhones are over.

The most mind-blowing celebration of Production Cutmas came in late 2017 and early 2018 when pundits claimed iPhone X production was cut (see, “production was cut”, that’s where the name Production Cutmas came from 2000 years ago) by as much as 60 percent, showing that the iPhone X was a garbage device that no one wanted. Later in the year, of course, we learned that the iPhone X had been selling quite well all year and we all learned a valuable lesson about speculation and never celebrated Production Cutmas again hahaha no, of course we went through the same ridiculous exercise all over again.

Production Cutmas does not necessarily come every year and some years it is celebrated more heavily than others but there is definitely a predictability to certain things.

For example…

“Samsung and Xiaomi Plan to Ship Upcoming Smartphones Without Charger After Mocking Apple Over Same Move.”

OH, MY, WHAT A SHOCKING TURN OF EVENTS THAT IS, WHO COULD HAVE FORESEEN THAT?

Everyone. It’s not because Samsung and Xiaomi believe that not shipping chargers is the right thing to do, it’s that they can get away with it now because it’s the industry standard because Apple does it. The Macalope fondly remembers when other companies started coming out with silver laptops with black keys after Apple introduced the MacBook Air and Lenovo’s CEO called it the “natural evolution of the space”. They weren’t copying Apple, it’s just that over time design naturally leads to silver laptops with black keys.

Well, here’s to another year of the same nonsense.

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