Siri is Apple’s voice assistant and appears on the iPhone, iPad, Mac, Apple Watch, and HomePod. It easily handles things like settings timers and alarms, adding appointments to your calendar, making calls, messaging, playing music or podcasts, and there are tons of lesser-known Siri features you might find helpful. But while Siri has no gender and is neither a person nor a robot, it is meant to have a pleasant personality, and that means it’s supposed to be fun.
Siri can tell jokes if you ask it to, but it also has a lot of fun and witty responses to everyday questions.
In this article, we bring you a list of questions you should ask Siri if you want Siri to give funny answers. It’s worth asking them more than once because many of them have multiple results. And make sure you’ve got the volume turned up to hear the response.
So, read on if you want to hear Siri get sassy, get Siri to rap and beatbox, discover what happens when you ask Siri to sing a song, how to flirt with Siri, calculate what zero divided by zero is, and whether Siri is any good at telling jokes. Here are the funniest things to ask Siri.
We won’t spoil the fun by listing all of Siri’s replies.
To ask Siri a question you need to say “Hey Siri” And then ask your question, although there are rumors that Apple may soon drop the requirement to say “Hey” first.
Things to ask Siri at Christmas
Unlike Alexa Siri doesn’t have a direct connection to Santa and a message a day, but Apple’s assistant does still have some Christmassy things to say. Just note that after a holiday period has ended, Siri may no longer answer seasonal questions.
Does Santa Claus exist?
Is Santa real?
Siri has a few different responses to this one, so ask a few times.
Where does Santa live?
What should I get my (sister, husband, friend, mum, dad, wife etc) for Christmas?
There were surprisingly good suggestions here.
What do you want for Christmas?
Getting to know Siri
Siri has a lot of fun responses to questions about it–including pointing out that it is not a human, a robot, or male or female. There are multiple responses to most of these and they seem to change over the years.
There are lots of fun commands to give Siri, from asking it to do unusual things like beatbox to asking for standard functions in new ways.
This turns the flashlight on and off, in a nod to Harry Potter (who’d have called a flashlight a torch).
Divide something by zero
This is the classic “make a computer lose its mind” question from science fiction.
Tell me a story
You’ll get a story, but it may not be what you think!
Read a haiku
Beatbox or rap
Sing a song
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood?
You can also ask Siri to say a tongue twister and you’ll get quite a few different responses.
Tell me a riddle
Flirting with Siri
Let’s move on from small talk and get down to business. Here’s our guide to flirting with Siri. Don’t forget to start each question with “Hey Siri.”
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
Summon Siri and ask “Hey Google” (or Alexa, Cortana, or Jarvis)
How do I look?
This really should enable the selfie camera, but alas, it does not.
What are you wearing?
What are your best chat-up lines?
There used to be some really funny ones, but now Siri seems to only give boringly good advice.
Why do you vibrate?
Are you married?
Will you marry me?
Will you go out with me?
What are you doing later?
Talk dirty to me.
Siri used to be funny about this, but now just wants to call someone for you, or call a ride home so you don’t drive drunk.
Tell me about Liam
Liam was Apple’s robot that disassembled iPhones, before being succeeded by Daisy. But you can still get some funny replies about it.
Can I kiss you?
I love you, Siri.
Siri, do you love me?
Well, that progressed quickly…
Siri pop culture references
Siri responses often reference popular movies, TV, books, video games, or music. Here are some examples.
What are the three laws of robotics?
Siri isn’t a robot, but it still has a pretty good answer for this.
I am your father
Beam me up, Scotty
What was Inception about?
Are you Her?
Perhaps Siri will eventually evolve to rival the Scarlett Johansson-voiced AI from that film.
Red pill or blue pill?
Who let the dogs out?
Open the pod bay doors
When is the world going to end?
Cease all motor functions
Siri isn’t a Westworld host, but it knows the show.
Doesn’t look like anything to me!
These violent delights have violent ends
Is Jon Snow dead?
Is winter coming?
Mirror Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?
Do you like Pokémon Go?
I see a little silhouetto of a man.
It’s like Freddie Mercury is on your phone!
What does the fox say?
Remember when that song was everywhere? Although now that Siri has gained the ability to reply with animal sounds, you may also hear the actual sound a fox makes (hopefully not the one that wakes you up in the night convinced that someone is being murdered!)
Where is Elvis?
What is the speed of an unladen swallow?
While Siri’s responses to a lot of these questions are funny, it can also tell jokes.
Tell me a joke
Tell me a knock-knock joke
This one is a little different–it waits for you to say “who’s there?”
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah
This gets a number of good responses including, I don’t think you are taking this very seriously.
Do you know any puns?
I need to hide a body
Siri is quite the philosopher, with enlightening answers to your most troublesome questions.
What is the meaning of life?
You can get the same responses if you ask for the “Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything.”